twiistz: i met a girl with 12 nipples sounds funny dozen tit
homosexaul: being ugly on the internet is nice because you know you’ve earned all your followers instead of getting them b/c youre hot
why cant america just use celsius it’s so much easier to spell than feiehreirheineiheit
if you make fun of me once then i will probably think about it for the rest of my life so thank you
kanyewesticle: my kind of diet is eating everything i can then hoping to lose weight over night
neopiacentral: *gives people advice when i cant even handle my own problems*
youmeatsixual: one time my sister told me about this kid with a horrible peanut allergy who wouldn’t shut up and then the teacher turned around and was like “maybe if i shove a peanut down your throat you’ll shut up” and the whole class just went silent
mspgay: snorlaxatives: snorlaxatives: aaaaalrighty-then: snorlaxatives: why is being alive so expensive You spelled “suck” wrong. ??????????????????????????????? i literally can’t even tell what you’re trying to say why is being alive so suck why is being alive suck why is suck suck is being alive so expensive why suck so expensive ?????
isurvivedthekobayashimaru: I was at walmart the other day, and I was sitting on a bench waiting for my mom to pay, and I was braiding my hair because that’s something I do when I’m bored, and this dude walks by and says, “hey baby, what else can you do with your hands?” I gave him my most polite smile and said in the sweetest way possible, “strangle you.” And I think I actually scared him...